The big move!

For those of you who haven't heard me screaming from the rooftop... or at least the 3rd floor balcony... We are moving!

It has been a whirl wind experience but we have the opportunity to move into a 4 bedroom 1 1/2 bath house with a yard so we jumped on it. We have less than 3 weeks to get packed up and clean up the apartment. It goes without saying that I am a ball of stress but I am so excited. FINALLY Kai and Bear will have a yard to play in and we will have a guest bedroom! We are going to be right down the street from Clarkston High School so that will be weird. We went to look at the house the other day and we could hear someone announcing at the football field. On the upside we will have a fantastic view of the fireworks show on the 4th! At times the move feels like a step sideways since we will still be renting but all in all it is progress. I will miss our gorgeous view at the apartment and the pool but that is about it! Things are going to be super tight for a while money wise so we will probably lose the internet access but we will see. I am nervous about Kai's reaction to the whole process. This apartment is the only home Kai has ever known. I'm sure he will do just fine. And if not I will at least have good stories to tell!

So..... I think I have milked this procrastination thing as long as possible. Off to pack!

For a good laugh...

Whenever I need a good laugh I need look no further than the Flathead Vally Police Blotter. For those of you who don't know Flathead Valley is in Montana...

Whitefish, my home away from home is at the north end of this beautiful valley as well as my beautiful mother! Don't ask me where I came across such a jewel as the Flathead Beacon's Police blotter. Lord only knows! But what I do know is that the writer is hilarious. I have spent many an hour laughing my ass off.

I have enjoyed these so much I thought I would share a few of them with you...

12:34 p.m. A 50-year-old stumbled into a Somers convenience store and appeared to be suffering some sort of medical issue. It was soon discovered that he was in fact extremely intoxicated.

(wow... )

2:13 p.m. A man was seen standing on a bridge in Columbia Falls with his britches down. Authorities responded and encouraged him to pull them back up.

9:58 p.m. Someone found it suspicious that an individual was looking at RVs in the lot of a local RV dealership.

10:30 p.m. An anonymous caller claims that a chimpanzee beat him up and injured his dog at a Lakeside grocery store. The reporting party adamantly refused to disclose his name, and no such monkey could be located.

5:23 p.m. An intoxicated man tipped over near a convenience store on Meridian Road.

(tipped over..... I love it!)

7:27 p.m. Someone in Coram noticed a pedestrian who looked suspiciously like a suspect in a recent rash of home break-ins. The concerned observer wanted to know if he could tase and handcuff the individual.

6:50 p.m. Two neighbors yelled at one another on Highway 2 East in Evergreen. Apparently, one of the individuals does not appreciate it when the other leaves the house in his boxer shorts. The scantily clad man responded to her criticism with loud profanity.

7:32 p.m. Two black labs, a blue heeler and a Chihuahua attacked an intoxicated individual on Shady Lane. The reporting party bravely fought them off with a garden hose.

12:37 p.m. Someone called to report an incident of animal abuse on McMannamy Draw. According to this individual, "Jehovah’s Witnesses" approached his home and did something to his dog with a remote control.

7:50 p.m. Someone on Larch Lane decided to toss garbage into his neighbor’s yard. The neighbor did not appreciate this behavior.

9:43 p.m. A small aircraft was temporarily misplaced but was later located at its intended destination in Libby.

(how do you misplace an aircraft....)

10:00 p.m. Drivers on South Cedar Road encountered an unexpected surprise when a woman decided to lie down in the middle of the road. Oddly enough, she had consumed large quantities of alcoholic beverages.

(yes, ODDLY ENOUGH....)

9:07 p.m. A barefooted baby was being carried by a woman on Big Sky Boulevard. The woman was wearing shorts.

I am so glad that the Beacon decided to publish these reports. I wish all towns did that. It makes for a good read that's for sure!

Baby OH Baby!

When I found out that my close friend was having a baby and wanted ME to plan her shower I was beyond excited. My first thought was INVITATIONS. Sure you can find websites that have beautiful invitations that you can personalize. On average I found that it would cost around $45 to $50 for 40 invitations. For less than that you can MAKE one of a kind invites of your own.

It starts with a trip to JoAnn fabrics (or your favorite scrapbooking store). We picked out a background that we liked. And blank postcards (the scrapbook paper wasn't think enough for our liking)

Then we picked out some textured paper that coordinated with our background (this is what you will print all your info on)

Using my favorite editing program I then printed out the info onto the textured paper. I thankfully remembered to print some test pages on plain paper first. After a few tweaks I got the results I was looking for.

To add to the overall awesomeness we found some ribbon with sticky backing and these adorable tiny buttons. I took the time to sew some string into the buttons for effect.

With a little glue ok... a lot. I glued the background to the postcards, pressed them for a few hours. Then cut out and glued the printed paper to the background. After another good pressing I cut to length and attached the ribbon. I used a little hot glue and steady hands to attach a few buttons and Wah Lah! Adorable one of a kind invitations.

I even had enough scraps of the background paper to cut out some trees to add to the envelopes for another little detail. I had a blast making them and I hope everyone who receives one enjoys them as much as I do.

Congrats Laurel I can't wait to see the little one!

Crafty Shout Out

I was scrolling through all of the craft inspired blogs and websites I have bookmarked trying to find some inspiration. I love seeing what other people come up with and how I can make it my own. I thought it would be fun to find you what YOU turn to for inspiration and share a few of mine as well.


Craftzine is an AMAZING site with everything from knitting to jewelry ideas.
http://blog.craftzine.com/

This woman is SOOO creative! If I had half the creativity she has in her little finger you could never get me away from my sewing machine!
http://ohsohappytogether.blogspot.com/

For those days when I want to be girly and need some inspiration... it has TONS of hair and make up tutorials.
http://www.pursebuzz.com/

Berroco has tons of free patterns.
http://www.berroco.com/pattern_library.html

Patons is a favorite of mine. I use their 100% wool yarn to make just about everything I felt and they have great patterns!
http://www.patonsyarns.com/pattern.php

This is my new favorite site. I love the idea of taking the old and making it new and fun. So many great ideas!
http://www.threadbanger.com/

So now it is your turn. Where do you go for crafty inspiration?

Bimbo Barbie.... Sorority Style

Today I found myself in the middle of Pledge Week on WSU Campus. Why you might ask... My husband is working on a job on campus and I had the pleasure of getting up at 3:30 in the morning and joining him for the day. I have never been a fan of the Greek System but I have to admit, today was entertaining to say the least. Never in my life have I seen so many mindless clones! Picture at your own risk HUNDREDS of girls in nearly X-Rated shorts and tank tops running in packs like desperate over processed wolves... I doubt the words self respect, dignity, or individuality are part of these girls vocabulary. I would be surprised if any of them could even spell individuality... unless it happened to be the name of a Clinique fragrance... which just so happens can be bought in The Cub on campus! As I sat there in a sea of ass cheeks and gladiator sandals I couldn't help but think of the commercial where the people are on a conveyor belt and come out the other side plastic and identical. I think it is a Hanes commercial, which now that I think of it is funny due to the fact that a thong wouldn't even be small enough for some of these girls.

Now I am no size 0 model myself but quite a few of these poor sheep shouldn't be allowed within 10 feet of an article of clothing that requires less material than a dish cloth. I don't mean to offend any future, current, or former member of the greek system. Remember that it is with humor and creative license that I write this little rant. I am sure... or at least hopeful that most of these girls are inteligent driven individuals. But when you step outside and feel like you just woke up in Booty Short Bimbo Barbie Sorority Pledge Land you can't help but panic as you feel your brain cells slowly dying.


Granted if I had 2% body fat and a golden tan I may be tempted to wear as little as possible too... but for the love of all that is Holy break the freaking mold and put on some clothes! And whatever you do............ DON'T DRINK THE KOOLAID!

I'm officially a coffee snob...

Years of working in coffee shops has made me a little more than picky about my morning joe. As much as I would love to wake up and brew my own double shot 16oz white chocolate raspberry latte I will have to wait. I have yet to find an espresso maker that produces barista quality brew. My main complaint is that not a single one of them can actually steam and froth the milk. $500 will get you a commercial grade espresso machine but who wants to fork up that kind of dough. I used to buy syrups at URM but frankly the charge WAY too much for flavored simple syrup. If you are a victim of coffee snobbery.... that's a word right... I have a treat for you.

........

Here are two different Vanilla Syrup recipes that cost practically nothing to make and taste fantastic!

The first one is a basic vanilla simple syrup and to tell you the truth tastes just like the syrups we used to use at the coffee shop.

1 cup sugar

1 cup water

1 tsp vanilla extract

In sauce pan heat sugar and water until sugar is completely dissolved and solution is clear. Remove from heat and add vanilla. Let cool to room temp and store in refrigerator. I store mine in a vinegar bottle (I love the lid)

The second uses vanilla beans and has a very fresh flavor and smells fantastic.

1/2 cups sugar

3/4 cup water

1/2 vanilla bean

In a medium saucepan, combine sugar and water. Slice vanilla bean lengthwise and drop it into the saucepan. Cook over medium heat, stirring once the mixture comes to a simmer, until all sugar has been dissolved. Remove from heat and scrape vanilla seeds out of the vanilla bean and into the syrup. Cool completely, then store in the refrigerator.

The closest thing to frothy steamed milk without an espresso maker. I love it!

My 3 year old knows the ALPHABET!

As a mother I am always looking for fun ways to educate my son. Being a stay at home mom I have this underlying fear that if he isn't progressing I am failing. We had hit a developmental road block. If I wanted him to try something he immediately was against it. This made it very hard to teach him anything. I would draw a letter on his doodle pad and tell him what it was. His response was, "NO IT NOT!". Is it possible that he has skipped his whole childhood and gone straight to defiant teenager? I was at wits end until my mother took him to Montana for a week. He came back with the VTech Little Einsteins Learn & Go Laptop. He loves the fact that he has a 'puter' like mommy. I kid you not within a week he knew the alphabet! As we speak he is learning vowels. It has 18 games including matching games, bigger or smaller, hide and seek, letter progression, numbers. The list goes on. I am constantly blown away by how much he is learning.

If you are a parent or have a friend with small children I highly recommend getting this. One great thing about it is that it claps when the child gets one right or makes a sad sound when they get it wrong then encourages them to try again. I can be in the kitchen making dinner and still be able to tell him good job or nice try. He feels like he is such a big boy now. In such a short time he has gone from stubborn and unwilling to excited and eager to learn.

We have bought Kai tons of developmental products and games in the past but this is the first one that has actually sparked the learning bug in him. I love love love this thing! If you don't have it run out and get it right away!!! You won't be sorry.

Thank You Breezi!

As I mentioned before my Fairy Blogmother Breezi (so glad you like the title!) had a blogaversary contest and I won. I have been anxiously awaiting my prize and I finally got it today!!! It is an adorable hand made candy bar bouquet and a card. Yes, Chip was right it does look a little Halloweenish but I love it! Breezi wants to sell them online and I think it is a great idea. It shipped all the way from Ohio to Washington State with little damage (just a few wrinkled spots on the top). There are 10 candy bars total.... at least there was when I got it :)

I was so impressed with Breezi's idea to have a contest thanking all the people who read her blog. And to MAKE the prize herself made it even more special. It has inspired me to give something back. She doesn't know it yet but she will have a present heading her way soon! I know that my blog doesn't have a huge following but regardless it has been such a cathartic experience. It has been my own personal therapy session. I have always loved writing and people tell me I always make them laugh so.... I put the two together. No matter how stressful a situation may seem if you can take a step back and look at it with new perspective it all seems funny. For example: The Fish Blood Incident... at the time I was disgusted and frankly pissed off! But when I took a step back and tried to look at it from and outsider's point of view it made me laugh. It is funny when it isn't happening to you. Before Breezi convinced me to start my own blog I was the kind of person who laughed at bloggers.... (SORRY!) I still don't see why anyone would want to read anything I have to say... but I enjoy it and that is all that matters.

So Thank You Breezi for my bouquet and for encouraging me to start blogging. As soon as I am done writing this I am going to start on a little Thank You gift of my own. Hopefully it will turn out as nice as yours!

Going Postal

For the life of me I don't get how some people can be so lazy. A mail man is PAID to put your mail to your mailbox and bring larger packages to your front door. It is their JOB! So why is it that our mail man can't manage to do just that? Both FedEx and UPS seem to be able to make the trek up to the apartment door but the mail man... OHHH No.... That is just too much work. Instead they leave a note in our mailbox and put the package in the Apartment Office. When I tried to call the local post office I was given an 800 number that put me on hold for 20 minutes before they could track down our post office's number. When I was FINALLY connected with the local office I asked them their reason for not bringing the packages to our doors. The response I got was: "There are just far too many stairs and it is a liability."

Really? What kind of people are they hiring? If you are so mentally challenged that stairs are a liability maybe you should get a desk job.... in a strip mall... Not to mention that the whole thing is just crap. Maybe if everyone in the apartments had large packages on the same day.... but since that is never going to happen the whole excuse is just ridiculous. The stairs are all fully covered so even rain or shine the stairs are dry. I don't know what I expected when I called them. It isn't like they are going to say, "Well, Mrs. Johnson the reason your mail man doesn't bring your packages to your door is because he is a lazy, fat, under achiever and we don't want to pay for any injuries." Do you have any idea how much a mail man makes? 50,000 a year... and most of the time they never have to get out of their vehicle. I made less money working flood and fire restoration packing personal belongings out of sooty nasty homes! Maybe I should get a job as a mail carrier. Apparently you get all the government perks with no effort at all!

Beware of flying toddlers...

It was really hot out today so I decided to take Kai down to the pool. He got a little upset about having to wear his life jacket but quickly forgot about it when he discovered jumping off the edge of the pool. He would stand there while a swam around a bit and then he would tell me that he wanted to jump. After about 3 minutes of "Are you ready to catch me?... You catch me!... Ready!" he would launch himself and laugh hysterically. We had been doing this for almost an hour when I started having a conversation with another mother about swimming lessons. Before I knew it Kai decided to skip past all of our previously set routines and just pile drive me. With out a word he jumped right on my head. The buckles on his life vest dug into my eye lid and right below my eye. The look on the other mother's face combined with the searing pain made me a little worried. I went into the bathroom to take a quick look. There was a little blood but nothing to be alarmed about. It had already stopped bleeding by the time I got back out to the pool. Needless to say I was done swimming for the day. Kai on the other hand didn't see what the big deal was and threw the mother of all fits when I started packing up and heading back to the apartment. I was going to add a picture of my battle wound but I thought I would wait to see how it looks tomorrow. I'm pretty sure I'm going to have quite the shiner!

Surprises

Although life as a stay at home mom is never boring I still get as giddy as a school girl when it comes to surprises. Today has been full of them! The first one came when Kai was playing with the Little Einsteins Blast Off Learning Laptop Nana bought him. He was playing the bigger smaller game and got every one right. Then he turned to me and said, "I'm ready to learn letters now." I was surprised at how many letters he knows! I got so excited that I overloaded him on sugary treats as a reward. (In hindsight not such a good idea) He was on such a sugar high I swear he was levitating. The second surprise came when Bear starting herding Kai. On closer inspection Kai was trying to pry the safety electrical socket cover off the outlet with daddy's screwdriver! I was so proud of Bear that I gave him hot dog and let him lay on the couch.... again probably a bad idea. The third surprise came when I got an email from my Fairy Blogmother Breezi. In case any of you were wondering who got me into blogging... She had decided to have a Blogovsary contest and I had won! This made me so excited that I yelled YAY really loud and scared Kai and Bear. When I told Kai what had happened he said, "Awwww Breezi is so nice." Even though I was chosen at random it was still a very validating moment. It was like Christmas morning all over again. Breezi is so crafty and creative I'm sure whatever I won will be absolutely amazing. I'll have to come up with an equally generous way to thank her! I can't wait to see what other surprises today has in store for me.

Kai's Vacation Wrap Up

Nana couldn't help but write one last letter.

Saturday, July 25

The last day of my vacation with Papa and Nanna! I slept in till after 8a.m. When I got up, the farmer was already here with his tractor putting the hay into rows so that he could make it into big round bales. Papa fixed us pancakes and bacon for breakfast. Nanna said I could take my favorite cup home with me. I got alittle upset when she started to put my bed away, but was excited to see Mommy and Daddy and Bear. Nanna wouldn't let me play with my "pewter" until we got in the car, so I played with Taz. It was a nice day for a drive. I played games on my pewter for a while and then started to fall asleep. Nanna said we could put my pewter right next to me, but I told her NO. It stayed in my lap the whole time I slept. I woke up right before we got to the resturant to meet Mommy and Daddy. Grandma Turi and Grandpa Gene were already there. I showed Grandma Turi how good I am on my pewter. I think she was impressed! Then Mommy and Daddy got there. It was soooooo good to see them. After lunch we took pictures and I got to stand up in the back of Nanna's car. When we got ready to go, I was not happy because I wanted to go in Nanna's car. I was crying and telling Mommy I wanted to go in Nanna's car. Nanna started crying too. She told Papa she wouldn't cry, but when she saw me crying, she couldn't help it. Papa said "I thought you weren't going to cry." and Nanna said "Well, HE started it!" It was good to be home. I played with Daddy, and Bear, and my toys as soon as I got home. That was a fun vacation! Nanna took lots of pictures and she is going to send them to us so I can show everyone all the fun things we did.

Day 6

Today was the last day of Kai's big vacation adventure. Tomorrow we drive up to Coeur d' Alene to pick him up.

Friday, July 24

What a difference a day makes! I woke up with a small Ponderosa in my diaper, but after Nanna took care of that, it was a wonderful morning. Got just a bit queazy after my first sip of milk, but then had oatmeal and toast with huckleberry jam for breakfast and all stayed down. Papa discovered the Ponderosa diaper in the garbage and was making funny gagging noises when he took it out on the deck. Nanna laughed and laughed at him. I don't think Papa thought it was that funny. A farmer got here early this morning and started cutting the hay in the field right next to the yard. Papa asked him to cut the hay on the second acre too. It was fun to stand on the chair on the deck and watch him go around and around on the tractor. I took some pictures of him. We all hope they turn out. Nanna and I went in to town and visited Nanna's boss Addie for a while and then we went to Kalispell and went shopping. I got my very own computor like Mommy's and I got a work bench and tools like Daddy's. Nanna said they had a big sale and that's why I am so lucky. We went to McDonald's for lunch and then went to Costco and I got new winter PJs. I fell asleep in the car and Nanna let me finish my nap in my carseat in the driveway. Then we played on my new computor while Papa fixed dinner - bar b que pork and fried rice. Then I helped Papa water the garden, and threw the ball for Taz and helped clean out his pool, and filled it with water with the hose....and Oh - I had ice cream with bananas and chocolate syrup, and I took a bath, and now Nanna thinks I am going to bed, even though I'm pretty hyped up on the ice cream.

Day Five... And oh what a day it was!

My poor munchkin!!! And poor Nana. Thankfully she survived Kai's Linda Blair day...

Thursday, July 23

Well, I hit the wall this morning. I felt great when I got up, but really didn't want any breakfast. I found out later why. I had some milk and string cheese at about 10a.m. and then something incredibly discusting happened. My stomach started gurgling and then I'll be darned if that milk and string cheese didn't come shooting right out of my mouth and nose! I was choking and gagging and Nanna kept saying "It's OK" and when I could finally breath again, I asked Nanna what happened. She said I "threw up". Not sure what that means, but I'm not really in to it. So Nanna cleaned me up at the kitchen sink and then she cleaned up the stringcheesemilkthrowup......I heard her say it was worse than cleaning up topramenthrowup. I decided I didn't want anything else to eat or drink for awhile. Nanna and I sat and watched cartoons. When we took a break on the deck, Nanna noticed that I actually had string cheese in my nose! Who knew string cheese could go from your tummy - out your nose! I bet I could get on America's Got Talent with that one!! I felt alittle better and thought maybe a banana would fix me right up. BANANAS DO NOT FIX YOU RIGHT UP!!!You cannot believe how slimey bananas are that have been in your tummy - even for just a minute. I was kind of in shock with the stringcheesemilkthrowup. This bananathrowup freaked me out. I think Nanna was alittle freaked out too when she tried getting it up off the carpet. But all was well again. I decided the less movement I made, the better. Took a nap in the chair and woke up to dry heaves. (These are Nanna's words) I heard her telling Papa about it when he got home. I'm telling you right now - I'm not a huge fan of "dry heaves". That's it - no food or drink for me! I caved alittle later and had a grilled burger with cheese and some watered down juice. It stayed down!! (There were some touch and go moments though). Nanna kept asking me if I was OK. "Listen Nanna, if there isn't string cheese or bananas shooting out of my nose, I'm fantastic!" Nanna had been calling Mommy all day to give her updates and she decided Papa needed to go and get some medicine just in case. There was no way I was going to eat or drink anything else, but when Nanna mentioned POPSICLES....I thought - That's GOTTA help! So I had two.I took a bath, Nanna and I sat on the deck and talked about all the highlights of my amazing vacation so far, we came in the house, I felt that old familiar feeling, asked Nanna to pick me up, and shot popsiclejuice in two directions in the kitchen (and all over Nanna's shirt). Good news - I am not running a fever, and I don't know it, but Papa got me Pedialite Popsicles at the Pharmacy. I sure hope tomorrow is a bright sunny pukefree day!

Mommy "ESPN"

I usually call my mom around 2 or so and see how her day is going. But today I had the urge to call her at about 10:00 in the morning. She didn't answer her phone but I didn't think anything of it. At about 10:30 she called me and as soon as I answered she said, "Do you have ESPN?(ESP for those of you who don't speak smart-ass) I responded with, "I don't think so, why?". Turns out just minutes before I called her Kai had projectile vomited all over the couch and my mom. Then again all over the kitchen floor. He has only done this one other time in his life, when he had a 102 degree fever. So far his temperature is fine and his mood is improving. To tell you the truth I think Nana is enjoying the cuddle time. Minus the Linda Blair impression of course. Nana has canceled Kai's play date today and is playing nurse instead. It looks like Kai is going to follow in his mom's footsteps and get sick every time he stays with his grandparents for a week.

Day Four

I love this one.

Wednesday, July 22

Today was a busy day. I played with Maclean and had a mini melt down. Then we came home and played some more and I had a mini melt down. Then we went to lunch for Nanna's birthday and came back home and I had a mini melt down. Then we went to the park for a 55th wedding anniversary party and I had a really big melt down. Nanna looked at herself in the mirror this morning and said something about dark circles under her eyes. Tonight she looked in the mirror and was saying something about how grey her hair looked all of a sudden. I had to get after her earlier today. She wasn't listening to me, so I had to point at her and start counting. I only had to count to one before she got the message. I didn't want to leave the park today and I told her that and to make sure she knew, I told her I was "serious!" But I still had a good day. I took all my clothes off when I got home from the park and I played in the pool, watered the flowers and threw the ball for Taz for a really long time.One time I threw the ball in the tall grass and I had to go in and help Taz find it. There is stickers in that tall grass. I did alittle high pitched screaming trying to get out of there with no clothes on. By the way, in case you didn't know, every night before I go to bed, I tell my personal secretary - (Nanna) - that we have to write our letter. I'm not sure she would remember if I didn't tell her. I will remind her to write again tomorrow night.

Day Three

Another chapter in Kai's Amazing Vacation

Tuesday, July 21

I got up early today and Papa put me in Nanna's bed and I woke her up. I had toast with huckleberry jam, and eggs for breakfast. Aunt Rachel brought my cousins Maclean and Shafer over and we played for a long time. Papa had to go and do a guide trip on the river in the afternoon, so Nanna and I just played around the house. I fell asleep in the chair in the middle of eating my peach yogurt. Nanna woke me up after a while and I did my daily naked romp in the pool. Then we watered all the plants in the green house, and Nanna's flowers, and then Nanna turned the sprinkler on and me and Nanna ran through the sprinkler for a long time. Nanna got really wet, cause she had clothes on. Tonight Nanna and I had banana splits for dessert.Good night Mommie and Daddy and Grandma and Grandpa!

Day Two

I am loving these updates my mom sends. It is making being away from my son so much easier.

Monday, July 20

Today was a busy day. We all got up really early and Rachel came over with Maclean and Shafer and we had 3 car seats in the car to go up and float the river. Maclean and I threw rocks in the river and we had our life jackets on and I fell over twice. We went down through the rapids and I was scared, but then Maclean came and sat next to me and it was fun. Papa is the best rower in the world. We stopped at Goose Poop Island and Papa fished and Maclean and I threw rocks. Then we stopped at a nice beach and we threw some more rocks and looked for spiders in the sand with a stick. We ate crackers and string cheese and drank lots of water. Maclean and I splashed the water with the oars. Papa tried to get us wet when we went through the rapids. It was a fun trip on the river. We all fell asleep on the way home. Then I pooped for the first time in 2 days. After that....I took all my clothes off and played in my new pool. Then we had dinner and I drank lots of milk. I took a bath and Nanna tried to drown me when she was washing my hair. I'm OK though. I am sitting on Nanna's lap and trying to distract her from writing on the computor. Nanna looks kind of tired today. She seems kind of ring dingy too. I hope she is more lively tomorrow!

Day One

My mom sent me an adorable email about how Kai is doing in Montana. I just had to post it.


Sunday, July 19 - 9p.m.

Today I slept till almost 9a.m. Papa made us pancakes, sausage and eggs for breakfast. We pounded alot of nails, went to town and got new river shoes, watered the tomato plants and the flowers, and filled up the new pool that Papa brought home from the store this morning. Then I got in the pool with my new river shoes on - and all my clothes. Then we took off all my clothes and I played in the pool naked - except I still had my river shoes on.Oh - and I layed in bed with Nanna and read a magazine and then I went and told Papa that Nanna pushed me off the bed. Then I came in and told Nanna she better be nice to me. Nanna see's a pattern here. Right now I am sitting on the couch with Papa and we are having banana splits. I don't know it yet, but as soon as the sun goes down, Nanna is going to put me in my pj's and I'm going to bed. I didn't have a nap again today, and tomorrow, really early in the morning we are going to go fishing with Rachel and my cousin Maclain and my other cousin Shafer. I tried on my new life jacket today, and it fits really good. I just came in and caught Nanna on the computor. She needs to wipe the chocolate off my chin and help me wear off the chocolate high that I have going on before bedtime. I told Nanna to say goodbye for now.

Munchkin Milestone or Mommy Meltdown?

BOTH!

So my little boy is going to go on his first trip without his mommy. Tomorrow we are driving up to Coeur d'Alene to meet with my mom and make the big switch. Kai is going to go stay with Nana and Papa in Whitefish for a whole 7 days! Now I am sure that Kai is going to be just fine. They are going to spoil him crazy. He gets to go rafting and Papa is going to buy him a sleeping bag. Nana has already picked up enough snacks to feed a village and a G.I. Joe for the 4 hour drive to Whitefish. She bought him a life jacket and clothes galore. Play dates have been set up with bunches of kids including going to his cousin McLean's house where he gets to play in the bouncy house and indoor playground shaped like a castle. (oh yeah that boy is S.P.O.I.L.E.D. but such a good kid! I don't know how they do it.) Needless to say Kai is never going to want to come home.

Me on the other hand.... Well lets just say that when we left him with Brandon's mom to go to McCall for 4 days, by the night of day two I was starting to go a little batty. By the morning of day three I was in full on withdrawal. I am a stay at home mom. And other than the occasional overnighter at his grandma's house I am with him 7 days a week 365 days a year. He is a mama's boy to the core and I love it! Lets face it he won't be this way forever. Before you know it he is going to want to be with daddy all the time. I will be replaced with football games in the yard and baseball at the park. I have accepted this and cherish every moment I get with him now.

Keeping in step with my last minute pack-itis and a little bit of reluctance and denial, I'm still not done getting him ready. Ok ok I'm not even close. Every time I try to pack up his things I end up cuddling with him on the couch instead. I'm hopelessly in love with my little munchkin and I don't want to let him go! Don't get me wrong I am looking forward to this trip. Brandon and I desperately need some husband/wife time. We don't get it very often. I am always in MOM mode. But the idea of not getting to tuck him in and hear him say, "I wuv you mama." is killing me. We have already decided that there will be no phone contact unless absolutely necessary. We don't want him to get confused or upset. He is only 3 so the concept of 342 miles between him and his mama will be lost.


Now comes the mushy part....




Despite all my separation anxiety I am so happy that Kai gets to spend some quality time with my mom. Even writing this I am getting teary. My mom is the most wonderful woman in the world. She is my best friend and confidant. She raised me to be strong and smart, and independent. She has taught me so much. We can spend hours on the phone one day and turn around and do it again the next. Without her I would be nothing. It would take a lifetime of praises to truly explain how much she means to me. I know Kai is in great hands.





And then there is Rick. Knowing that my mom has finally found her soul mate (no offense DAD) is the best feeling in the world. Rick aka Papa aka Peepa is amazing. His whole family is amazing. They have accepted us and taken us into their family without question. Rick's parents Darlene and Ray don't look at Kai and see their son's girlfriend's grandson. They see their great-grandson. There are no words for how great these people are. Rick gets so excited when Kai is around. All he can talk about is how he is going to teach him how to pee off the deck, and take him fishing. If you ask Kai what does Peepa say he gets a big grin on his face and yells Yaaa Hooo! Peepa yells this so loudly and randomly that mom and I both about jump out of our seats every time. Kai on the other hand thinks it is hilarious.

And don't get me started on my mom's boss Ade (short for Adeline I think...). This woman is so generous and kind that it makes my heart swell. Her grandson Tarrin is a big ball of cuteness. And when I say big I mean BIG! He is only two and is already as tall as Kai and beefy. But back to Ade. Whenever we are it town she insists that we come over. Last time she took us to lunch and proceeded to feed Kai most of her food including a humongous piece of coconut cream pie. When we are in town and she buys something for Tarrin she buys one for Kai too. I kid you not there is something magical about this town. Everyone is so kind and giving. No one thinks twice about adding you to their family. It is just automatic. If Brandon's company had a branch in Montana I would move to Whitefish in a heart beat! The two short years I lived there changed me forever. When I am there I feel like I am home.

It is because of all of these amazing people that I can put my mommy anxiety aside and send Kai off on his first big adventure with confidence and pride. He will be more loved and cared for than any other child on the planet. We are truly blessed to have such a big family.

1st Camping trip as a married woman...

I have been married for almost 3 years now and a mother for all of it. I am embarrassed to say that we went camping for the first time last weekend. We both come from camp-a-holic families but I shied away from the idea because of our son. I was worried that he was too little and that I would be a nervous wreck so we waited until he was 3. Needless to say I was overreacting. Kai did fantastic! No one fell in the water... except the dog (it was hilarious). Both children (bear is our second child) stayed close to the camp site and did a pretty fair job of listening. All in all it was a beautiful weekend.

There were a few snags but nothing too major. We were woken up every morning by a murder of crows cawing like no tomorrow, I didn't have a sleeping bag and froze my butt off the first night so we had to drive into the nearest town (pop. 23) to try to find one... no luck. We had to drive and hour round trip but finally found one. We woke up to beautiful weather... and crows.... on our final morning and were looking forward to fishing. Within minutes of casting out the temperature dropped about 10 degrees. We looked up and saw thick clouds rolling in. The mad dash to pack up began. It started sprinkling but nothing too bad. But the worst problem we ran into were the bugs. Oh Lord the bugs! During the day it was bees, wasps, horse flies, and a myriad of unknown creepy looking things, at night it was moth and mosquito heaven. Brandon got stung by a wasp which was a little scary since he used to swell up like a hot air balloon when he got stung. He didn't seem to have that problem this time thank God. I thought I was doing pretty well. I religiously lathered myself in bug repellent and seemed to get off with only 2 bug bites. I say seemed because when we got home they started popping up EVERYWHERE! Every time I applied the much needed Cortisone cream (which was every 10 minutes or so) I found a new bug bite. 20 in total... yes I said 20! All but three of them are on my legs.

If you have ever wondered what 20 mosquito bites feel like, though I doubt you have unless you are crazy, it is infuriatingly uncomfortable! It doesn't help that I react differently to bites than most people. To say that I am allergic to them sounds funny but I am. Usually the bite swells up to the size of a softball, is burning hot to the touch and makes me physically ill. It doesn't happen every time but more times than not. I didn't have that problem this time but they hurt like no other. As if the itching wasn't enough if I accidentally touch one or bump into something it feels like someone just stabbed me with a steak knife. They itch so bad that falling asleep is practically impossible. So add sleep deprived to my list of ailments at the moment. I am so uncomfortable that the idea of going camping again seems out of the question unless I wrap myself in mosquito netting or buy a bee keepers suit. I have tried every home remedy I could find for bites and none of them seem to help much. Though I must say making a paste of salt and water does take the itch away instantly. But as soon as you wipe it off they itch again.

All complaining aside the camp site was absolutely beautiful. I would do it again in a heart beat as long as I had and industrial sized bottle of bug spray and about 50 Citronella candles scattered around. I may just try the old wives tale of swallowing three whole cloves of garlic before you go camping. Yes you will smell like an Italian restaurant the whole weekend but mosquitoes hate the smell of garlic. Which seems appropriate since they are little evil vampires.

My favorite dish ever!

I wrote earlier about my Grandpa's Famous Lasagna. I decided to post the recipe because it is so easy and inexpensive. I did a little digging and I found out that my Great Grandmother came up with this simple and unorthodox recipe when she was a housewife struggling to feed a lot of mouths on a very small budget. So I guess it should be called Great Grandma's Famous Lasagna... but that is just too long. I say that this recipe is unorthodox mainly because it doesn't use ricotta cheese and has a few other surprising substitutes.

You Need:

1 to 2 lbs hamburger meat (depends on how meaty you want it to be. I use 2)
1 to 2 Spaghetti Sauce dried seasoning packets (again depends on how much meat you used)
8oz tub sour cream
8oz tub small curd cottage cheese
approx. 12 lasagna noodles (that is what it takes me with a traditional lasagna pan)
1- 28oz can diced tomatoes
1- 6oz can tomato paste (if you like you can buy the tomato paste in the tube. I prefer it because you only squeeze out what you need and the rest stays fresh)
1-8oz-ish bag shredded mozzarella or fresh (I hate grating cheese)
1-80z-ish bag shredded cheddar

Here is where you can play around with it. Add frozen spinach (well drained), shredded zucchini. Let your imagination go wild!

Brown hamburger in a large skillet. Drain and add seasoning packet(s) and diced tomatoes with juice. Stir. This is where the tomato paste comes in. I add a heaping tablespoon if my sauce seems a little runny. You want it to be thicker than spaghetti sauce. Once sauce is well combined set aside.

In a large deep pot cook lasagna noodles for about 8 minutes. You want them flexible but not done.

While pasta is cooking combine sour cream and cottage cheese in a medium bowl. (You could use ricotta cheese if you like) This is also where you would add the spinach if you chose to put that in as well.

When all ingredients are ready it is time to assemble.

Smear a small amount of your meat sauce on the bottom of the pan. Be careful not to use too much. You just want to create a barrier between the bottom of the pan and the noodles.
Next place one layer of noodles making sure to cover the pan completely. Then a layer of cottage cheese mixture followed by the meat sauce. Top with as much or as little cheese as you like. I probably go a little overboard on the cheese but I like it that way. Make sure all you layers go all the way to the edges of the pan. Repeat: noodles, soft cheese, meat sauce, and finally completely cover the top with cheese. I use a 2 to 1 ratio of motts to cheddar. It makes it nice and gooey.

Now all that is left is to heat it through. Place lasagna in 375 preheated oven. After 10 minutes check for bubbling around the edges. If you don't see a steady bubble check again in 5 minutes. When the sauce is bubbling evenly around the edges and the cheese is starting to brown you are done!

Take it out and let it cool for 20 minutes. This helps everything set up so when you cut into it all the sauce stays put rater than sliding out.

I hope you try it and enjoy it as much as I do!

I need to vent!

So while reading the news articles on my homepage I came across an article about the explosion at a Slim Jim factory in NC. 20 injured including 5 with critical burns on 60% or more of their bodies,and 3 missing. I clicked on the message board because occasionally there is more information. I was amazed by some of the comments I found.

"This is obviously the work of those Obama loving, liberal terrorists. They hate Jesus and Slim Jims"

.....

"Meat processing plant....Hmmm, what is the first thing that comes to mind? Illegal aliens. I wonder if an illegal who couldn’t speak English was smoking next to a natural gas line.

No está permitido fumar, dummy."

.....

"ConAgra, one of the largest employers of illegal aliens in the country. Get one that can't read (English or Spanish) and you are asking for a disaster. Hopefully all of the Americans are safe and alive."

.....

And here is a comment posted after a former employee at the factory pointed out that the majority of the employees were Caucasian and African-American. Trying to deflate all the illegal immigrant talk...

"I live in NC and I can tell you the illegal alien population has grown exponentially in the last 15 years. The African-Americans who used to work there are probably unemployed now."

.....

And another defended these comments when others became offended by saying that "...it is human nature to find comedy in tragedy" and, "remember the space shuttle blowing up??
next day I heard this joke. The teacher on the shuttle had blue eyes, one blew this way and one blew that way.. "


That wasn't appropriate either! Why is it that these people don't even consider that those lost or injured have family that are grieving. There are people in the hospital fighting for their lives and others are making jokes. It is just cruel and wrong.

.....

I am just amazed at how tragedy can bring out all the ignorant bigots. Nowhere in the article does it say what caused the explosion. Nor does it mention anything about the nationality of any of the victims. All these comments just arose out of sheer stupidity. For every sincere comment about prayers for the families and the injured there were 3 like the ones above.

To take a tragic occurrence and use it to push these narrow minded views makes me ill. No wonder so many countries think Americans are assholes. These are the people representing us! I pray that the families of those missing don't stumble across these comments.

Comfort Food

Growing up I had a favorite dish my mom would make for me. My grandpa's lasagna. We don't know for sure where he got it but the name stuck. When I grew up I insisted that she give me the recipe. I couldn't believe how simple it was! I used to work on a ski resort in Montana called Big Mountain. We had a Superbowl cooking contest that was judged by the ski patrol. I thought it was a perfect opportunity to show off the family recipe. And sure enough I won!

Lately I have been craving it like crazy. I don't make it very often because I'm afraid that if I do it won't be so special anymore. But I think it is time to pull out my little black recipe book where I keep all the family secrets and bake my heart out. I will try to take some pictures of the finished product. And with my mother's permission I will post the recipe too. It is just too good to keep a secret. I think it should be a staple in any mother's arsenal.

How did blood get on the ceiling?

Yesterday was one of those pull your hair out need a Valium IV sort of days. When my husband called me and asked me if he could go fishing after work I was less than excited about the idea. I had been looking forward to punching out when he got home and taking a relaxing bath. Then I realized that considering my mood it was probably best that he wasn't here. So off he went with horse/dog in tow... at least I had one less child under foot! The rest of my evening went surprisingly well! Kai went to bed without any problems and I finally got to relax. Everything was great until..........

Brandon finally came home at around 11:30 with 5 huge catfish. He was grinning from ear to ear like a little kid. It was cute. After he told me about his exciting adventure he started trying to cut the heads off of his still squirming catch. That was my cue to go far far away. (nothing grosses me out more than the sound of a butcher knife repeatedly whacking at a fish) I got all cozy in bed and decided to watch a movie. I don't know what I would do without surfthechannel.com. That's right, I have no problem watching illegal movies online. Have you seen rental fees lately? By the way He's Just Not That In To You was great!

My first mistake was in coming out to check on his progress. There was blood everywhere! On the floor, counter, walls, everything. I decided to just crawl back into my comfy little cocoon and hope for the best. Around 2am I could hear Brandon shuffling around in the cleaning closet and the smell of Pinesol. I made my second mistake in assuming that meant the kitchen would be clean.

At around three all was silent. My movie was over and I decided to make another sweep of the house. Brandon was passed out on the couch, my house smelled like fish, and the kitchen looked like a crime scene. The floor was spotless. I'll give him that, but the counters, walls, appliances, cupboards, and well everything on the counters.... Lets just say it looked like a fish blood paintball exploded. I just shook my head, made a mental to-do list for the following day and went to bed.

When Brandon got up for work he came in to give me a kiss and tell me that he had cleaned the kitchen. Me not being a morning person and generally lacking the brain to mouth filter made some less than friendly remarks about his cleaning skills. I was a little harsh but in my defense he knows better. You don't pet a hungry lion and you don't try to talk to me first thing in the morning. Especially when you have left me a mess that would make the cast of CSI say "GROSS!" He looked like I just kicked his dog. I instantly felt bad and tried to make up for it by saying, "It's ok. Thank you for trying. It was really late and it's a start. I'll just take care if it later." I doubt it helped.

So I finally stumble out of bed and into the kitchen for some much needed coffee. The kitchen still smells like fish and wow..... there is blood everywhere! I shake my head and stumble to the fridge for the creamer. Coffeemate Vanilla Caramel, can't live without it! I don't know what possessed me to look up but I did. I'm pretty sure what happened next woke up the neighbors. In an almost involintary moment I screamed, "HOW THE F***K DID YOU GET BLOOD ON THE CEILING!" Not my finest moment I have to say.

So here I am trying to muster up to energy to don the rubber gloves and clean the kitchen from TOP to BOTTOM.


Still waiting for that Valium IV....

Cereal anyone?


Ohhh it gets better


Did I mention I don't even like catfish?


EWWWWWWW.


This is above the Kitchen sink. On the OPPOSITE side of the kitchen from where he was cutting them!


And finally yes... that is the ceiling. Nice huh?

Where is the mute button!

There was a comedian once that said moms have a mute button behind their ear so when their children are screaming "MOM MOM MOM MOM MOM MOM" they can just press the button and they don't hear anything. They just see a child mouthing words. Ohhhh how I wish this was true. Today it is all I can do to get a moments peace. As soon as I sit down Kai screams MOM! MOM!.... so I get up and see what he wants. NOTHING! Or he wants me to pick up the toy RIGHT in front of him and hand it to him. Now the logical side of my brain is telling me that he wants attention. So I try to play with him and he tells me to go away. I think the comedian got it all wrong. We don't have the button, our children do. It's true! Our children have a mommy time button. As soon as we try to sit down and have some mommy time the alarm goes off and tells them that they need to show us their booger or announce that the picture on their wall is an elephant. ANYTHING to make us get up. I have tried to ignore the MOM call but I just can't. I keep thinking that the one time I don't come is the time he really needs something. Just in the time that I have been writing this I have gotten up 4 times.

1. Because Lightening McQueen just blew a tire. And this is a big deal!
2. Because the tool bench needed to be 3 inches more to the right....
3. To show me his guitar "pick-it" which I had just handed him on my last trip.
And
4. Because he needed more juice (the juice cup was still full)

I sure would like to know where that mute button is.....

One step closer

Today there was a monumental achievement in the Johnson household. Our 3 year old son went potty in the potty chair!!! In mommy world this is a HUGE thing. There is officially light at the end of the poopy diaper tunnel!

Well that didn't go as planned!

Yesterday my husband tried to be spontaneous and suggested we take a drive up river and go to the beach. Normally I would be totally on board for a beachy day but I was feeling more bitchy than beachy that morning! To say I'm not a morning person is an understatement! I need at least 2 cups of coffee and about an hour or so before any communication should be attempted. So when my enthusiastic husband bombarded me not ten minutes after I woke up I was less than excited about our plans. I tried my best to put on a smile and get ready. The longer I took the more impatient my husband got. Which made me even more cranky. We were off to a great start! By the time I got ready, got Kai ready, and gathered the essentials it was well past noon. We still had to go to my in-laws house, the grocery store, and a sporting goods store (Brandon needed new sandals..). By this time Brandon is getting a little snippy with me which I handled well............

We finally get on the road and everything calms down UNTIL we see how high the river is. There were no beaches at all! The further we drove the worse it got. We finally found one beach but there were about 20 people and 10 cars crammed onto a tiny patch of sand. So that was a total bust! We decided to drive back into town and take things from there. My husband decided we should go the a public beach I had never even heard of. It was PACKED!!!! But he was so determined to go to the beach that we decided to try it.

Ok first things first we unpack the truck and head to the water. We are immediately bombarded by a pit bull that wasn't on a leash. Bear drug Brandon down the hill resulting in lots of swearing and a scraped elbow. This is when I notice the big sign that says no pets on beach. I point this out but Brandon decides to risk it. We found a clear spot and set up. We tied Bear to one of the beach chairs and he was fine. He just laid there and watched all the practically naked teenage girls and very large women in tiny bathing suits. Kai had a blast playing in the water and I settled into my chair to get some sun.

Just when we thought things were finally going well..... parks and rec shows up and asks to speak with Brandon. Everyone on the beach starts to boo. Bear wasn't bothering anyone! He takes Brandon up to the truck and talks to him for about 10 minutes. This part blows me away.... He tells Brandon that we are lucky he is in a good mood and isn't going to give us a $65 dollar ticket for ignoring the pet rule. And says that we don't have to leave but if we want to stay we have to tie bear in the back of the truck!!!! IT IS 90 DEGREES OUT!!!!! So it isn't ok to have our leashed dog on the beach but it is ok to leave him in the back of a hot truck and with no shade. Did I mention this is the only free beach in town not shut down due to bacteria. OR the fact that there has been tons of media awareness about police cracking down on people leaving their pets in hot vehicles. Needless to say we left. People were coming up to us left and right telling us how crappy it was of P&R to do that. But hey that is the risk we took. And he was just doing his job.

All in all it was a pretty defunkt day.

Familiar Faces

Last night I ran into some familiar faces in a most unexpected place. I was walking our dog when he got excited and started dragging me towards a group of people in our apartment parking lot. Usually running into dark figures in the middle of the night is a bad thing. To my surprise it was some people from back in the day. (High School to be exact) I hadn't seen one of them in almost 10 years.

I forgot how nice it is to stroll down memory lane. My 10 year reunion is next year and I have been strongly debating whether or not I was going to attend. I figured everyone I would like to see is still in my life so what is the point. It has only been in the past few months that I have realized how many people I miss. Sure there are a lot of people I don't care to see again but I put up with them for 12 years so what will a few more nights hurt...

I can't believe it has taken me this long to realize that the way you see yourself in high school isn't exactly the way others saw you. I always thought I was rather invisible but I'm finding out that I had more friends than I thought. Just goes to show how insecurity can be blinding. I'm looking forward to reconnecting with all the other friendly faces I may have forgotten about throughout the years. 10 years already! Wow time flies!

Little Mr. Bossy Pants

So Kai is having a bossy day. As we speak he is yelling, "PUT ME DOWN!". He has been telling me all day that he is hungry. Then when I put him in the high chair he takes two bites of his food then tells me he is done. It has been "GIVE ME THAT!, PUT THAT DOWN!, GO AWAY!, YOU DON"T TELL ME NO!!!" all day. I just love this new found independence. If I ignore him he gets mad. If I help him he yells at me.

It is days like this that make me want to turn off my phone, run to the nearest day spa, and hide until the urge to pull all my hair out passes. As a matter of fact I think there should be a government program that gives mothers a free spa day once a month. Lord knows we need it!

Beware of Random Crafting!

I wrote earlier about getting the craft bug again. While going through my craft box I found some felt left over from the baby booties I made for Niki's baby shower. A light bulb went on in my head and this is what came of it.

Mod meets underwater adventure.... LOL
This is what happens when I stay up late and watch Planet Earth...

Got the craft bug again!

Lately I have put my felting projects on hold. I tend to get discouraged easily. Not a good trait when learning a new craft! I got all excited about this really cute french market bag pattern. I picked out fantastic colors and off I went! It looked amazing before I felted it.... but the finished product was horrible! I had totally forgotten to look at the size of needles required and I didn't test my gauge. The bag was completely useless. Then I realized I had also forgotten to do the same thing with the computer bag that was almost 75% knitted.

When I realized that I was going to have to start over I got upset, buried it in my sewing basket, and forgot about it. For some reason I decided to go online and try to get some inspiration yesterday.

I found a couple of felting patterns that I want to try. I'm dying to go to Jo-Ann's and get what I need. It seems like whenever I find a pattern I like I don't have the right size needles. I guess I need to bump up my collection! I'm hoping these ones turn out better than the last. All I can say is Pay attention to gauge!

At first I had grand plans to start my own little bag company. Now I'm being a little more realistic. I would just love to be able to spoil my friends and family with absolutely fantastic bags. That's enough for me!

Looking forward to posting pictures of some fabulous finished projects!!!

Birthday party at the park

Kai's 3rd birthday party went really well. I would like to take this time to apologize to all the friends who weren't invited because we thought we were short on food. Turns out we had WAY too much! Kai got lots of great presents. He wasn't as excited about his four wheeler as Daddy thought he would be but it is only a matter of time. Overall it was a beautiful day spent with family and friends!

Problem Resolved

In case you have tried to leave a comment and ran into problems... I fixed it. So comment away!

And a Bear update: He seems to be perfectly healthy other than a small bacteria problem in his small intestines. The Vet gave us some pills and special dog food. All should be back to normal within 24 hours or so!

Good to Know!

I'm realizing that you learn very valuable lessons in times of crisis. Like for instance I can handle the sight of my own child's blood (aside from the initial moment of panic) we learned this when he split his eye open on the entertainment center. But I can not handle seeing my own child's bone. I learned that when he smashed his head into the coffee table. Let's just say we had a love hate relationship with our furniture for a few months. Boys will be Boys I guess.

First thing this morning I learned another valuable lesson. My husband is COMPLETELY USELESS when it comes to dog poop. If you have been reading my posts you know that yesterday our dog Bear started having some issues. I called a vet and he recommended we give him an Imodium AD tablet every four hours and see where we are in the morning. Everything seemed fine last night so my husband thought it would be okay to let the dog sleep in our room like usual.

***WARNING*** This next part may be a little TMI for the squeamish!

I woke up to the alarm clock and the faint smell of poo. I looked over to find that the dog had left us another "Split Pea Soup" surprise all over our bedroom floor. My husband seemed fine at first. He took the dog and put him back in the guest bathroom and we sat down for a cup of coffee. We decided that my husband should take him to the vet first thing. Now I think the next part is hilarious but then again I tend to be the kind of person that giggles a little when I see someone trip on a sidewalk. My husband proceeds to continue our current conversation as he walks to the master bathroom (he has to step over the poo in order to do so). Why haven't we cleaned it up? You may be asking yourself. #1 it is 4:30 in the morning #2 I haven't had a cup of coffee yet and #3 I'm hoping that my husband is going to volunteer to handle this one since I was knee deep in it yesterday. What happens next pretty much answered #3 for me.

As my husband is talking I hear, "They said **gag** that we **gag** should **gag gag**....." He couldn't even STEP over it without almost contributing to the mess himself! My big manly husband couldn't even walk near dog poo without gagging. I began to laugh uncontrollably. This happens three more times at least before it is time to take the dog to the vet. Each time he gagged I laughed. Yep apparently I am the kind of wife that laughs at her husband's weaknesses.

So now we have established that I am "Captain of the Poop Patrol" and I'm a big meanie. All in all a very educational morning!

Just when I thought things couldn't get worse!

If you have been following my week you are well aware of my pension to wait until the last minute. My mother is going to be here tomorrow and I just finally started making progress on cleaning the house. Everything was going well UNTIL....... Our lovable horse/dog Bear got sick. Before I knew it there was ....well... lets call it "split pea soup" ALL OVER the house! Including all over Kai's new Aqua Doodle. I grab the dog and Kai and go outside to make sure Bear is done. Everything seems to be fine now. So we head back into the house. I put Kai on the couch and Bear on the balcony.

Thinking that the worst is behind us I start cleaning up. NO! We haven't even begun! Next thing I know Kai is yelling NO BEAR! I look up to see that now the balcony is covered in "split pea soup". GREAT! I'm sure our downstairs neighbor is pleased! I call my husband (like he can do anything about it) But at this point I am loosing my mind. So once again I stop what I'm doing and redirect. Bear goes into the bathroom and I don the rubber gloves, put my lavender eye pillow over my nose, and start cleaning the balcony. One disgusting disaster taken care of! My next business of order is to go down and inform our neighbor of the "incident". To my immense appreciation he understands and tells me that he will take care of any resulting messes on his balcony. Time to head back into the house. After some spot cleaning (and a lot of gagging) I can vacuum the carpet and shampoo. Thank GOD we have a carpet shampooer. I can't even imagine what I would have done with out it!.

So here I am sitting on the couch waiting for the carpet to dry. Everything else has been put on hold. The Kitchen is still a mess, the laundry still needs to be done, the master bedroom needs to be cleaned from top to bottom, and the bathrooms need to be cleaned.

But at least when my mother gets here and sees the mess I can tell her.........
Yeah, well at least it doesn't smell like shit!

Kai's 3rd Birthday... What a circus it was!

So my little munchkin turned three today! Well.... technically yesterday (it is 12:38 A.M.) I am still reeling from my cupcake sugar high. I had some bizarre notion that he would understand what was going on. Based on how our morning started I was sadly mistaken. Our conversation went as follows:
.....
Me: Happy Birthday Kai!
Kai: No it not!
Me: Yes it is silly! Don't you know that you are three today?
Kai: I don't tink so.
Me: Well you are so Happy Birthday!
Kai: Okay! Happy Birfday Mommy!
Me: No no no it is YOUR Birthday. You were born three years ago today.
Kai: Nuh Uh....
Me: Okay fine.... do you want pancakes or oatmeal for breakfast?
.....
After breakfast I cleaned the kitchen and prepared to make Kai his birthday cupcakes. THIS part he understands. Well the cupcake part anyway. The time it takes to make them on the other hand..... not so much. After all the ingredients were mixed he wanted to taste it. When I told him they weren't ready he threw a fit. After I poured them into their cute little paper cups he wanted to have one. Again upon hearing that they weren't ready he threw fit. When they came out of the oven he wanted one.... Big fit! Once they were cool I lined them all up and turned my back for a second to grab the frosting. I turn back to see one cupcake has a HUGE bite taken out of it and there is Kai with chocolate crumbs on his face. He gives me this innocent look as if to say "What? That one was already like that!"After the cupcake battle was over I tried to frantically clean house... Why? Read THIS and you will see. As if I didn't have enough distractions both Kai and our 90lb Chocolate Lab Bear follow me everywhere I go. So as soon as I stop there is this chain reaction like you see in cartoons. Kai runs into me, Bear runs into Kai... I am trying to make some sort of progress before my husband gets home since I know he is going to be tired and we still have to go to "Wal-Hell" and pick up a few presents for the birthday boy (Yep I married a procrastinator as well).

So my husband finally gets home and we load the dog in the back of the truck and head off. We get to the parking lot and it is packed as usual. As soon as we get 10 feet from the truck Bear decides to jump out and is hanging buy he measly 6 inches or so of chain.... Needless to say he is a genius. Thankfully he slips out of his collar and my husband heads back to the truck to shorten the chain. We haven't even gotten into the store and we are already having problems. Our "quick" trip to buy a "couple" of "inexpensive" toys turns into a Spoiled child's dream. Brandon (my husband for those who don't know) heads straight for the bike section and starts looking at Power Wheels... Yeah the perfect toy for a child who lives in a third floor apartment...
He begins drooling over the Yamaha Raptor four wheeler even going as far as to ask an employee to cut down the demo so we can see if Kai is big enough to ride it. I can see that this isn't going to end well and I am screaming inside. This thing goes up to 5 miles per hour... which doesn't seem like much until you are trying to chase it down! It costs more money than we brought so Brandon thanks the poor employee for taking it down and tells him we will be back tomorrow to buy it. Now silly me I thought he was just being polite after we made the employee go through so much trouble.... NO! He really plans to pick one up the next day. So there goes our inexpensive shopping and we still haven't picked out what we came for so a quick trip is no longer an option. We finally settle on an Aqua Doodle and a Sock Monkey (Kai is OBSESSED with monkeys). It is now 8:00 P.M. and we still have to go home, do the cupcake thing, make dinner, and take a bath (which is necessary after the cupcake!) Not to mention call Nana so she can wish her grandson a Happy Birthday and hear about his presents.

Two cupcakes later Kai is having a MAJOR sugar rush and dinner is the last thing on his mind. He is clinging onto his monkey for dear life and won't even let me touch it. All the while ordering me to draw various items on his Aqua Doodle... non of which I know how draw. We have a very interesting conversation with Nana where he tells her that he doesn't want her to come see him, then gets mad when she says she won't (I'm thinking it is the sugar talking). Then it is dinner, hose down and FINALLY bed time. Which surprisingly was the easiest thing we did all day. He went to bed contently holding his monkey and wishing me a Happy Birfday.

Just a few of my crafty adventures

Every once in a while I get the creative bug. My husband has slowly learned to just let me be. (I have been known to stay up all night working on something) Here are just a few of my crafty adventures. Nothing spectacular but fun projects none the less!

This is the first felted purse I ever made. I had just learned how to knit only a month before I started it.


My tiny little felted clutch. (the second purse I made) Just big enough for a cell phone, some lip gloss, and a wad of cash. What else does a girl need?


Baby booties I made for a friend's baby shower. Pretty good for a middle of the night project I think!


Wash Cloth bath duckies I made for her shower as well. They have a kitchen sponge inside them and were a hit at the shower.


So far I haven't managed to get any pictures of the jewelry I have made before someone runs off with it!