The Random Blogger Strikes Again...

As if the title isn't warning enough I thought I should point out that this post will be filled with random thoughts and goings on for the past week. So buckle your seat belts and try to keep up!

First of all my reunion was bitter sweet. I had a lot more fun than I expected but I was disappointed that I didn't get to catch up with everyone. Although I wasn't surprised to see that quite a few people are still stuck in high school mode... I was surprised at my reaction to the glares and over the top eye rolling. There wasn't even the tiniest ping of rejection. In fact it was hard not to laugh out loud. We hadn't even taken three steps into the mixer the first night and I got the full on bitch glare from a girl... Congratulations Shannon you win the Snobby Award! You will be receiving your trophy in the mail along with a $1000 gift certificate to the Proctologist of your choice. And I feel it is my duty to let you know that if you are going to keep sticking your nose up at every person you see you might want to consider getting a nose job...or at least a nose hair trimmer... just sayin' (I know she isn't reading this but that was fun!) Other than that mess I had a blast. It was fun to see how people have grown. In the shoulda woulda coulda department I wish I had been a little bit more brave. I pretty much stuck to observing the festivities and not joining in. It was fun watching classmates sing Karaoke though... and it is probably best for everyone that I didn't join in :)

Kai had a blast at the family picnic. And in total Kai fashion he managed to bleed, expose himself, and throw up all in a 2 hour period... THAT'S MY BOY! And while I am on the Kai subject.... As his grandparents picked him up on Friday Kai turned to me and with his "serious voice" he said, "If you need me just call me". I'm still not sure where he got that or why I would need to call a 4 year old.... So that pretty much wraps up the reunion stuff.

After all the craziness of the reunion I was looking forward to a relaxing Sunday. I had my day all planned out.

10:00 am: Roll out of bed
10:15 am: Consume entire pot of coffee
10:20am: Position pizza box on coffee table for maximum all day grazing
10:30 am-10:30 pm: Lay around in my pajamas watching T.V. and playing video games

This is not how my day went. Ok... the first half is about right. I was well on my way to total laziness when my husband came home and in what I can only describe as an energetic blur when whizzing past me. This obnoxious blur then informs... no orders me to go put my bathing suit on. We are going up river. All I could think is "SUPER!"... my feet are sore (4 in peep toe pumps..... adorable! Practical dancing shoes..... not so much) and I am just plain not in the mood. But I decided to suck it up. I did drag my not a people person husband through two days of reunion events. I owed him this. So we loaded the kid and the dog into my husband's '71 Chevy truck... no air conditioning... YIPEEE. And up river we go. Of course all the beaches are full so we have to drive FOREVER to find a beach. Finally we find a beach that meets my husband's criteria. Which I am now learning includes a treacherous rocky decent followed by rocky waters and lurking rattlesnakes. Once I survived the trek to the beach I was looking forward resuming my relaxing day. In hindsight trying to get Kai water ready with one hand while holding the leash containing a 97 lb bundle of hyperness in the other was no the way to achieve relaxation.

No sooner had I gotten the ok to let the dog off his leash all hell broke loose. He tore off to the next beach over to go play with 3 pit bulls. Brandon had to run after him and drag him back. This was actually a funny sight. Here comes Bear rounding the corner walking on just his front feet due to the fact that Brandon had a hold of his tail and the scruff of his neck and was hauling him like a wheel barrow. As I have mentioned in the past our Lab is dumb. He manages to fail at everything labs are supposed to excel in. He is afraid of cats and squirrels, he will retrieve a ball but as soon as he drops it he pounces on it and it shoots off in a random direction. This as you can imagine makes playing fetch rather frustrating. And last but not least he can't swim. He just stays in one place beating at the water with his front paws frantically trying to stay afloat. He still has no idea that he can use his hind legs... I will give him some credit though. He started to figure it out as the day went on. And I learned a very valuable lesson as well. If you make the mistake of getting to close to him he will try to sacrifice you in an attempt to stay above water. This is painfull and rather scary! I have lovely bruises on my arms and legs to prove it. If all of this doesn't sound like loads of fun just wait!

As the sun started to fade we packed up and again made the death defying climb back up to the truck. This was immediately followed by cussing and finger pointing. The keys are missing. I have learned to anticipate the blame game when my husband is stressed out. If something bad happens it is my fault. In this case it was my fault because if I hadn't let the dog off the leash Brandon wouldn't have had to throw down all of his things and chase after him. Never mind the fact that he TOLD me I could let the dog off the leash... or the fact that he usually leaves them in the truck but decided to put them in his back pocket. OR the fact that he checked his pockets before he went swimming and felt his keys but thought it was just change... because as I mentioned he always leaves them in the truck when we go up river for that exact reason. So after several more trips up and down the path of death we finally conceded that the keys had been sacrificed to the river monster. Thankfully there were other people at the beach that waited and watched in awe as Brandon hot wired his truck. Yes my husband knows how to hotwire a truck... yay for shady skills! I didn't say a word the whole way home and it apparently registered with my husband. The moment we pulled into the driveway he apologized and admitted that it was his fault and that I didn't do anything wrong. Then he sheepishly asked for my keys so he could make copies of everything. All in all my relaxing Sunday was a mess. But I got a good tan :)

And last but not least (take a deep breath the finish line is in sight) we are waiting to hear back on some pretty exciting news. NO I'm not pregnant. Brandon is possibly being given a promotion and steady work with the company he loves working for. It looks like all those years of hard work might finally pay off! I knew he deserved it but it is nice to see that they do too! So wish us luck! I will keep you posted.

I've been thinking...

I know... stand back! With my 10 year reunion literally knocking on my door (festivities start tonight), I began to wonder.... Do we ever really escape our past? High School ends and we all part ways. We grow up, make mistakes, LEARN, and evolve. We slowly outgrow our childhood and become more polished wiser version of our former selves. Or so we hope. But they don't know that. They don't know that I am different. They remember me just as I was in high school. That would be just fine if I liked the person I was back then... I started thinking about all the people I knew back then and how few of them I still keep in touch with. Then I thought about how I view them all. Not surprisingly I still picture them as they were back then. I don't exactly have new material to reference... So then must do the same with me. So does that mean that the 10 year reunion is just a feverish attempt to show off the new improved you? Is the 10 year just a warm up?

Then I started thinking about my life and how much I have changed. I am not where I thought I would be yet everything turned out just fine and I like my life. This made me think about the people in my life that are struggling. People who are also not where they thought they would be. I thought about all the times I told people to stop sweating the small stuff. And finding the positive in all things. I realized that I am horrible at taking my own advice! Why is that? When someone else is in need of comforting the words just come freely. Everything is so clear. But when I am struggling I fail to see the logic in my own advice. I can so easily see the beauty in others but not in myself. Isn't it weird how that works?

THIS made me think about self perception and how I view my life. The way I saw myself in high school is probably way different then what others saw. So have I been freaking out for nothing? Probably so... I'm sure there are those out there that don't like me and will always look at me in a negative light. But the only thing that matters is how I view my life. If I am happy with the progress I have made their perception is of no importance to me. Once again this is sound advice that I probably won't take. It is easy to pretend that that I don't care what others think. And it is easy to tell someone else that they shouldn't care. But it does get to me. I want to be liked. I want people to see the good in me. So does that make me insecure? And if so have I really changed or do I just think I have? At this point there are just far too many thoughts running through my head.

I tried to think about what I learned in school and I drew a blank... nothing. I learned nothing in school. Great! I am dumb. I spent 12 years in school and I didn't learn a thing. Ok, I have to try to think about something else because this is just making me sad... sad and dumb. Back to what I can control. Now, I can control how I feel now. The excitement of reconnecting with old friends. The stupid things that will go through my mind while getting ready. I even went so far as to try on different outfits and send the pictures to my friend. Just to make sure I was staying true to myself and not trying to go over the top to impress anyone (She is the type of person that would tell me if I was :) no feelings spared). I want to look good but I don't want to look like I put a lot of effort into it... ok too late for that.... I want to be me. The funny thing is that me now is NOTHING like me then. I think I maybe wore a dress once in high school and that was under my gown at graduation. I was a tom boy for sure. But the "now" me .... she wears peep toe pumps and carries designer handbags. Will people think I am trying too hard? Probably... but I will know that I am just being me. The new improved wiser version of my former self....

Yes, I am throwing a fit.

I have never been "popular" and it is safe to say I am no stranger to rejection. But seriously, I am getting a little discouraged. I have been blogging for over a year now. And while I find it therapeutic I can't help but get a little depressed when I log on and see that I have 2 followers.... 2! And I am pretty sure only one of them is actually reading this. Thank you Breezie :) Why do I even bother? I might as well be talking to a wall. Obviously years of perfecting my ability to disappear have paid off. I am officially transparent. No one wants to hear what I have to say and quite frankly I don't blame them. Who wants to read a random blog from a random person rambling about random things? I am beginning to think that this whole blogging thing just isn't for me :(

There you have it. My Pity Party... I could keep going but what is the point... no one is listening.

No More Diapers!

I am super excited to say that today is the 7th day in a row that Kai has pooped in the potty. Yes! Kai has gone a full week without one single accident. Well... there was one but it was so darn cute we have chosen to strike it from the record. I was still in the process of waking up when I see Kai fly out of his room with his pants half off and run into the bathroom yelling, "Got to pee got to pee got to pee!". Then I hear "NO! Stop! Argahhhh!". I run into the bathroom just in time to see him sitting on the potty trying to stop the pee from hitting the wall. He had made it to the chair but didn't have time to get everything tucked in.

I know that this doesn't seem that exciting to most. But to a parent.... priceless! After 2 exhausting years of potty training he has FINALLY got it! Tonight Grandpa Jim is taking him out for ice cream to celebrate. Now Kai has poop brain. Everything is about poop. After he eats or drinks anything he has to point out that it makes you poop. It is all just so new and exciting. He insists on telling everyone he sees that he is a "Pooping boy" now.

Why, is that a dead fairy on your bum?

Any of you that know me know that I often have a perverse sense of humor. A perfect example of this being my desire to get a Lady Cottington's Pressed Fairy tattoo. Now for those of you who don't know what they are read on. For 7 years my mom ran a Novelty store in our local "mall" I use quotations because it is more like a strip mall mutated by radiation. In this store we had everything from funny greeting cards to fake puke and whoopee cushions. We even had an 18 or older section with joke condoms and penis shaped cake molds. Looking back on my childhood there is little doubt where my innocent sense of humor began to take it's detour into the morbid and grotesque dirtiness it is now. But back to the fairies... sort of.... There was this tradition in my dad's family where everyone drew a name. The person you drew was the person you got a gift for... kind of like a secret Santa sort of thing. My cousin Carly and I are only 4 months apart and just to appease us they let us in on the drawing... we always drew each other.... imagine that. So every year I picked something out from the store (lucky her... who doesn't like fake poo?). Carly loved fairies and we just so happened to have this calendar called Lady Cottington's Pressed Fairy Calendar. I will dive more into details later, but for now the short of it. These weren't your ordinary fairies, these were dead squished fairies. I thought it would be a funny gift but I had no idea it would turn into a yearly tradition that to this day still makes me smile. She loved them so much that even into her college years she still plastered her dorm room with the poor flattened beings. It became our little thing.

The images in the calendar came from a book by Brian Froud (there are actually several of them) called LADY COTTINGTON'S PRESSED FAIRY BOOK. It was set up like a scrapbook journal of sorts. In which Lady Cottington often rambled on about strange things and just so happened to capture fairies and press them in the book like pressed flowers... only squishier... The images are fantastic and beautiful. As soon as I was old enough to even think about getting a tattoo I couldn't think of a better image to have permanently attached to me. I still haven't done it but I will. In recent years I have seen a few of them here and there (one of the suicide girls has her whole back done in them) I still hold on to the notion that I may not be an original but I bet I'm the only one who will be able to look at it and think about Holidays long past and a bond with my cousin that will, unlike the subject of our bond, never die.

The book cover

My FAVORITE one and probably the tattoo I will be getting... not on my butt as my husband suggested. Although I do see the humor in that I do admit :)

These are just some of the MANY great images. Every one of them makes me giggle.