You did what? WHERE?

This morning I woke up to "Mommy I have poopy butt!". As I sat there trying to slowly adjust to this whole being awake thing everyone keeps talking about I realized just how much motherhood has changed my life.

Before motherhood I woke up when I felt like it.
Now I wake up to "MOMMY! It's Morning! I want cartoons!"

Before motherhood the scariest thing I had to worry about finding in the tub was a spider or hair
Now... "Mommy, I frew up in the baftub"

Before motherhood if there was a wet spot on the floor it was because I spilled something.
Now... "Kai, what did you spill on the floor in your room?".... "Nofing, I peed."

All of the sudden it dawned on me. The moment you become a mother your whole life revolves around bodily fluids. And just when you think you have it all figured out they find a way to change it up on you.

For example: Kai and I were getting ready for bed. I changed his diaper, put him in pajamas and picked out a book for the night. Just as I'm getting ready to sit in the rocking chair Kai tells me that I need to turn off the light and turn on the lamp. Okie dokie... no problem. The giggling should have been a red flag.... Before I knew what was happening I had a HUGE slimy booger on my hand and Kai was laughing so hard he was barely able to say, "I put a boogie on the light". He turns off the light now.....

Things that used to gross me out don't even phase me anymore. I don't know how I feel about that... Getting puked on SHOULD gross you out. Fishing a "brown trout" out of the bathtub.... SHOULD gross you out. Finding dried food you can't even identify under the cushions of the couch SHOULD gross you out... instead it is like a game "I'm going to go with.... Lucky charm?"..... "No, raisin?"

And last but not least.... I have learned that when Kai wakes me up to tell me he has poopy butt.... I'm going to have a shitty day.